Okay, I've finally wrestled my story into a place where I want (and definitely need) critiques in order to determine how to improve upon it. If anyone's willing to bite, I'm willing to do critique exchanges. My story is approximately 5800 words long. I'd appreciate any and all feedback people are willing to provide. 
EDIT: I've now fixed the title of this thread; I initially listed volume 33 instead of volume 34 by mistake. 
If you are in difficulties with a book, try the element of surprise: attack it at an hour when it isn't expecting it. ~ H.G. Wells
If a person offend you, and you are in doubt as to whether it was intentional or not, do not resort to extreme measures; simply watch your chance and hit him with a brick. ~ Mark Twain
R, SF, SHM, SHM, SHM, F, R, HM, SHM, R, HM, R, F, SHM, SHM, SHM, SF, SHM, 1st Place (Q2 V38)
Ticknor Tales
Twitter
4th and Starlight: e-book | paperback
I'm willing to take a look. I don't have anything ready to be critiqued at this time but I'll take a rain check for Q2 if that's alright. I'll send you a PM with my email.
I'm willing to take a look. I don't have anything ready to be critiqued at this time but I'll take a rain check for Q2 if that's alright. I'll send you a PM with my email.
Sounds good! I'll send it your way this afternoon. 
If you are in difficulties with a book, try the element of surprise: attack it at an hour when it isn't expecting it. ~ H.G. Wells
If a person offend you, and you are in doubt as to whether it was intentional or not, do not resort to extreme measures; simply watch your chance and hit him with a brick. ~ Mark Twain
R, SF, SHM, SHM, SHM, F, R, HM, SHM, R, HM, R, F, SHM, SHM, SHM, SF, SHM, 1st Place (Q2 V38)
Ticknor Tales
Twitter
4th and Starlight: e-book | paperback
I've already submitted for this quarter, but am willing to take a look. I'll also take a rain-check for a future critique
HM Q1 2015, Q3 & Q4 2016.
R Q1 & Q2 2017
The Trade's On, in Issue 8 of Sci Phi Journal, November 2015
Naidin's Song: Blood Bound, published August 2016
Nine-Tenths, on Empyreome (Weekly Flash Fiction,) June 2017
I've already submitted for this quarter, but am willing to take a look. I'll also take a rain-check for a future critique
Thank you! Sounds like a plan. I'll PM you my e-mail address.
If you are in difficulties with a book, try the element of surprise: attack it at an hour when it isn't expecting it. ~ H.G. Wells
If a person offend you, and you are in doubt as to whether it was intentional or not, do not resort to extreme measures; simply watch your chance and hit him with a brick. ~ Mark Twain
R, SF, SHM, SHM, SHM, F, R, HM, SHM, R, HM, R, F, SHM, SHM, SHM, SF, SHM, 1st Place (Q2 V38)
Ticknor Tales
Twitter
4th and Starlight: e-book | paperback
