Five Minute Rant

Dates, man, give me DATES.

It helps if you show a little leg.

Naughty man, my mind is much cleaner, clearly. I was about to hand over the dried fruit.

My mind is clean. Evil Martin has a mind of his own...

+1 on the Duotrope word count rant. I first noticed it when I selected Shimmer off the list of markets a particular search returned, only to find out after looking at the website that the story was 1K over.

+1 on the Duotrope word count rant. I first noticed it when I selected Shimmer off the list of markets a particular search returned, only to find out after looking at the website that the story was 1K over.

I think you have to adopt a policy:

1. Run a non-length-specific search.
2. Check their guidelines.

This is a bit of a pain. I would rather not. But I really like IGMS. I feel sad that I've missed a chance to send them some good stories. And now I have to wonder what else I've missed?

OK, I realize I just said upthread that rationality is optional on this thread.

But I think I just chanced upon a good rule for the rant thread: It is impermissible to rant about the success of other writers on this thread. Their success is a thing to celebrate, not to whine about because you envy them their success.

And no, this rule has nothing at all to do with the coincidental fact that Ken Liu has made sales to BOTH Asimov's AND Analog in the past week, during which time I received rejections from both...

(Seriously, Ken, if you happen to read this, congratulations! I love your work. But I was doing just fine, taking my rejections from those two markets in stride, and then I saw your results. I'm happy for you, but boy I'd like to join you!)

OK, I realize I just said upthread that rationality is optional on this thread.

But I think I just chanced upon a good rule for the rant thread: It is impermissible to rant about the success of other writers on this thread. Their success is a thing to celebrate, not to whine about because you envy them their success.

Good policy. Reminds me of another forum I stalk where some guy keeps calling a former WotF winner his nemesis--you know, in that way that makes you think the winner doesn't even know she's someone's nemesis. It's just kind of…weird.

Let happiness for other's successes abound!

ETA: And hey, Martin, we all know you'll get there someday!

Reminds me of another forum I stalk where some guy keeps calling a former WotF winner his nemesis-

Tee hee, I know who you're talking about.

I don't get it either.
He's a good guy tho. Harmless.

Shit, I forgot to rant about something.

Uh...

I suck! <img src="

Whew. I almost didn't make it out of this post alive.

I don't like waiting. I hate waiting. I hadn't received any replies for almost a month. It was...disturbing.
I would welcome any response.
But five rejections in 20 hours?

Well, off to the next markets then (a lot of them).

OK, I realize I just said upthread that rationality is optional on this thread.

But I think I just chanced upon a good rule for the rant thread: It is impermissible to rant about the success of other writers on this thread. Their success is a thing to celebrate, not to whine about because you envy them their success.

Good policy. Reminds me of another forum I stalk where some guy keeps calling a former WotF winner his nemesis--you know, in that way that makes you think the winner doesn't even know she's someone's nemesis. It's just kind of…weird.

Let happiness for other's successes abound!

ETA: And hey, Martin, we all know you'll get there someday!

And that reminds of Big Bang Theory, where Wil Wheaton is Sheldon's nemesis. *grin*

EDIT: My attempts at ranting failed. Must delete them. I'm too tired today and a little burnt out after an all day field trip with my daughter's class. I will refrain from typing until my head clears.

OK, I realize I just said upthread that rationality is optional on this thread.

But I think I just chanced upon a good rule for the rant thread: It is impermissible to rant about the success of other writers on this thread. Their success is a thing to celebrate, not to whine about because you envy them their success.

Good policy. Reminds me of another forum I stalk where some guy keeps calling a former WotF winner his nemesis--you know, in that way that makes you think the winner doesn't even know she's someone's nemesis. It's just kind of…weird.

Let happiness for other's successes abound!

ETA: And hey, Martin, we all know you'll get there someday!

The internet sure does paint an extra coat of crazy on each of us, doesn't it?

(I know this is a rant thread, but count me in as another person who thinks you'll do well, Martin. Every time I read one of your stories I can't imagine you not doing well for yourself. All you have to do is keep writing...And you too Marina, you've been averaging a Finalist a year, so that is why I'm convinced THIS has to be your year. And Dustin, I don't think the universe will be able to rest until you win. You're creating quite a disturbance in the Force--This is going to be an exciting year on the forum, I think

How am I supposed to rant when all you people are saying such kind things? I guess I'll just have to...

WRITE! WRITE! WRITE! etc.

And no, this rule has nothing at all to do with the coincidental fact that Ken Liu has made sales to BOTH Asimov's AND Analog in the past week, during which time I received rejections from both...

(Seriously, Ken, if you happen to read this, congratulations! I love your work . . .

Such is Ken Liu.

I counted myself as doing well when I noticed that my acceptance letter to DSF seemed to have gone out in the same batch his did. (At least that's what Duotrope lead me to believe.)

Aw, thanks Tina. I see success in your future too, girl!

I had no idea rant threads could be so warm and fuzzy.

I had no idea rant threads could be so warm and fuzzy.

I think it might be my fault. I can't let a rant thread go unpositivized for too long!

Form rejection from ASIM less than 24 hours after submitting. Sigh.

The story's up at Baen's Universe Slush, if anyone's interested in having a look. Was my Q3 '11 HM, and remains one of my favorite stories . . . but yeah, she's been rejected a lot. In other news, I am guilty of Duotropery and need to cut that shit out.

24 hours? OW! I've never seen anything come back that fast.

I have an under-24 from Clarkesworld.

So I submitted to Lightspeed at 12:06 AM, my time. You click submit, it takes you to the 'thanks' page with the submission number. I immediately open my email and click on the link, just to see how far back I am in the queue. I'M ALREADY 'IN PROGRESS.' It didn't even take a minute.

I may get an under-1 hour. I'll report in the morning.

I've submitted to Lightspeed several times before, but this is faster than fast. It's a good thing... and a bad thing.

So I submitted to Lightspeed at 12:06 AM, my time. You click submit, it takes you to the 'thanks' page with the submission number. I immediately open my email and click on the link, just to see how far back I am in the queue. I'M ALREADY 'IN PROGRESS.' It didn't even take a minute.

Wow! That IS Lightspeed!

So I submitted to Lightspeed at 12:06 AM, my time. You click submit, it takes you to the 'thanks' page with the submission number. I immediately open my email and click on the link, just to see how far back I am in the queue. I'M ALREADY 'IN PROGRESS.' It didn't even take a minute.

I may get an under-1 hour. I'll report in the morning.

Yes, John Joseph Adams is a freak of nature, I don't think he sleeps. He certainly reads it all too as I've had a couple of personal rejects in the past that proves it beyond all doubt!

And no, this rule has nothing at all to do with the coincidental fact that Ken Liu has made sales to BOTH Asimov's AND Analog in the past week, during which time I received rejections from both...

(Seriously, Ken, if you happen to read this, congratulations! I love your work . . .

Such is Ken Liu.

I counted myself as doing well when I noticed that my acceptance letter to DSF seemed to have gone out in the same batch his did. (At least that's what Duotrope lead me to believe.)

And now watch as I play the role of creepy stalker:

Did anyone notice in this week's Woohoo!s (the section in the Critter.org newsletter that announces when Critters members have made a sale) Ken Liu sold a story to Asimov's, and one to Analog, AND one to Lightspeed. That's crazymouse. I wonder if he actually got all those acceptance letters in one week, or if he just happened to pop in and report them all this week.

Not that I'm in the know, but Duotrope says he did. At least, I seem to remember seeing all three acceptances this week.

And my story still sits there. False hope, I'm sure.

I was immediately "In Progress" at Lightspeed from the minute I submitted until I got my rejection, slightly more than 24 hours later. Do they actually have any status that comes before "In Progress?" This was my first submission there, so I've never seen one.

Unless they changed the system, it normally says Received first.

Unless they changed the system, it normally says Received first.

Ah, interesting. Good to know. Thanks!

Unless they changed the system, it normally says Received first.

Yes, they changed the system a month or two ago.

Just after my last submission then! Lol

Okay, here I go. I have a rant.

I queried a market yesterday because my story was taking over the normal time limit for their submissions. I was expecting the "you'll hear back from us in a few days" because most of their stuff was coming out at later dates.

Instead, I get a rejection letter which says "in the end, it didn't quite work for me."

Wait, you held onto it for this long before finally deciding it didn't work for you? Why the heck would you respond to a query with a rejection letter? If you held onto it for over three months, wouldn't you think I would get something more than "didn't quite work?"

There, I've vented. Back to the grindstone and finishing up my undergrad.

I have a rant too.
I wish to rant at myself.
I wish to rant at myself for checking my e-mail every 15 minutes, and Duotrope, and this forum. Aaaaargh! Get a life, gator woman!! You're not going to win with this story, it doesn't matter what you get, go fry a fish or something!

There, better now.

go fry a fish or something!

There, better now.

Mmmmm! Fish n' chips!

Ai can has?

Mid-April, they said. Mid, meaning the middle of, not "late," meaning the end of. I have been waiting. Dutifully. Loyally. Painfully. This is the last market I wanted to try for this story before pulling the Amazon trigger.

I don't know how much longer I can wait, so today, I am preparing my ms. for Kindle formatting.