When You Lose

Posted by: @ellis

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a) give up - It's too hard, too unfair, and what are the chances, anyway?! Someone else always wins. 🙁

b) rationalize - Well, we really didn't try hard enough, did we? If only we weren't such shoddy craftsmen.
c) get angry - Those people wouldn't know a good story if it was a hunter-seeker and they were Paul Atreides!
d) try again

Ohh the four stages of writing grief, too real... 

Great article, thanks for sharing! 

@krqueen_writes Thanks KQ! 🌼

This is great advice, which I often forget myself while I'm in the throes of failure. I try and keep Thomas Edison's advice in mind, although it's not always easy: "I have not failed. I've just found ten thousand ways that won't work."

@morgan-broadhead You're 100% correct; I also find it almost impossible to take my own advice when I fail at something. But here we are, trying and trying. It's the best, only, and most important thing we can do in terms of writing success.

Thank you for writing this post.

I write for myself; it's cheap therapy. I write to push the real world back; nothing better after a tough week. And recently, since I've found WotF, I am writing to get published.

The accomplishment of finishing a story is a wonderful feeling. Constructive criticism, on the other hand, is a rollercoaster of emotions. Not all thrilling.

I've touched on a-c and then forced myself into d. Many times.

Writers write.  

So, to all the writers out there: Don't let rejection get you down.  

Have fun and keep on writing.  

As @krqueen_writes said - these are like the stages of writers grief, and like the regular stages of grief I think its natural, healthy even, rather than taking an option, to go through all of them, in any sequence. You can even repeat some stages. But you have to focus on ending on (d) !

@toddjones yes, you are so right about criticism being a rollercoaster. Too often we send our precious ugly darlings into the world, only to be told we should consider sacrificing them at the altar of despair. 

And yes, I also write to understand, to escape. As I’ve told many writer friends, I love humanity best when seen through the hardbound cover of a book. 😜 

Thank you for your encouragement as well. 🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸

@gideonpsmith right on. Sometimes our anger and our self-criticism can be helpful, but finding that balance is tricky. I struggle with tying my value to my accomplishments, and writing is no exception. So when it hurts to grab the sharp end of a blade, it’s tempting to let go. 

your perspective—to cultivate rejection as a metric for growth has helped me immensely…